15. Attach positive feeling to each negative one.
By now you are aware of the trigger, that bothers you off and on. It is quite evident that, you can not escape negative feelings when a trigger is hit upon by you or by any one else, or even by the circumstances. Thinking that you have no strong will power to control the emotion will not work. A forceful control of the trigger will play havoc with your emotional health, and ultimately you will fail in the attempt. Taking advice of any one may put you further down, as they may not understand the basics of your problem. “Think positive” “Drop your worries” are the general advice given by others which hardly works when a trigger strikes.
Have you ever come across a well built adult who is afraid or a cockroach or a lizard? Can you find any logic in this? What makes them believe that a cockroach is dangerous or even harmful? This is his trigger which he has strengthened over the years.
What we feel is where our thought process stops and sticks. If somebody has been dishonest to me and made me suffer a huge loss, I have strong negative feeling, which gets strengthen each time I remember him. Unfortunately I remember him nearly hundred times in a day and literally brood over the issue. How am I to escape this trigger trap?
There is a way out. Without evaluating the trigger’s logic. Simply know that, this is a trigger. Now connect this trigger to a positive thought or positive emotion immediately. The idea is not to stick to the negative trigger and its emotions but to move over quickly to the positive one. Remember you can not avoid negative feeling once a trigger has been hit upon, but you can extend it to a positive feeling after diligent practice. The quicker you can switch over to a positive image more is the relief.
Take one example as mentioned above. If I have a strong negative feeling with person who has made me suffer a huge loss, what I should do. Suppose that person Mr. X is coming from the opposite side of the road & your heart beat increases. You feel strong anger and resentment to the extent the you want to beat him up then an there. What you need to do is to take a deep breath, close you eyes for a moment and remember an incidence where your spouse comes smiling from the opposite side and then walk along with you, hand in hand. Repeated attempts will slowly sooth you nerves over the issue. You will remember your smiling spouse every time you see Mr. X or even think about Mr. X.
Years before I was very sensitive to my health. A small inconvenience, a cold my make me unhappy emotionally, though there was no major physical problem. It took nearly six month to attach ‘Yoga and heath’ feeling to these unwanted feeling.
This is the most practical method to feel comfortable despite our turbulent feeling.
Attach positive feeling to each negative feeling quickly and repeatedly ....and fell better